How To Play: Low Down

I’ve been wondering what deep childhood event that I’ve repressed has caused me to automatically weep and sit quivering in a corner whenever the subject of graphics comes up in conversation: Yet again I feel drawn to write about graphics. I’ve finally finished Hitman (No thanks to you Craig) and looked at what I now have to play. This does of course include nothing, until I remembered about a game with cockney aliens, a half naked blue lady and a giant monster thing. Thanks to some randomer on Twitter, I can now attest to the name being Giants: Citizen Kabuto. Thanks to the wonders of Good Old Games (Which has a 100% track record with me so far, give it a try), I’ve now bought it legally, and am playing it through.

Before you get worried about me taking you to a nostalgic Neverland, I just wanted to note something that I saw while playing it. By today’s standards, graphically, it’s shocking. The whole world is built up of visible triangles (Or pyramids. Whatever geometry geek), and playing it in first person just felt…weird. Yet it’s fun. I’ve spoken about the fallacies of thinking graphics = fun before, but I can imagine that in the days this game was released, the box would have had on the back something like ‘Fight your way across 3 lifelike islands’. I doubt that even at the time it looked lifelike, but it would’ve been cutting edge technology at the time. Now? It just looks like you scaled every graphical slider you could to minimum. How about you try it?

I expect this is where the hardware geeks decide to come up in arms saying “But this graphics card cost me £XXX, I’m bloody using it”. Well, before you do, remember that that will make you sound like a whiny little child, so just sit there and think of a proper counter argument. I’m well aware that these graphics cards shouldn’t be put to waste. If anything, I’m suggesting you give these poor defenceless piles of silicon the chance to put their feet up instead of crunching millions of numbers to provide you with a few pretty pictures.

I think it’s another case of “You don’t know what you’ve got ‘till it’s gone”. Make the jump from Giants to Crysis and suddenly you’ll realise that it is a pretty game. If you can run Crysis on megahigh, put it down to low for a session. When you throw it back up, everything will seem much more realistic. Give it a try.

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